


I Never Hated You

by NeuroWriter14



Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Cherik - Freeform, Have my Cherik feels, I wanted to write my own Dark Phoenix Cherik fic, Just saw Dark Phoenix, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 01:44:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19415902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeuroWriter14/pseuds/NeuroWriter14
Summary: Erik finds Charles in Paris and it brings up memories of the past and starts a new future for them both.





	I Never Hated You

**Author's Note:**

> This has probably been done to death. I don't care. I have feels.

Now

Charles hadn't been the same for quite some time. He had never told anyone, not even Hank, that his encounter with Sabah Nur had done more to him than he cared to admit. When he finally recovered, he found his powers enhanced beyond what they had been initially. Where he could normally only feel the minds within and the few around the mansion, he could now feel those in the surrounding town. It was disorienting when he got into big cities to feel all the minds in the city. He had always had a problem with feeling the minds around him. It was invasive to him as much as it was to everyone around him. He didn't want to be in everyone's mind as much as they didn't want him there. In a way, being a telepath had made him arrogant. He was forced to face his own arrogance very bluntly and eventually he thought the best way to handle it was to step away from everyone and everything for a while. But he found himself in another big city surrounded by thousands of minds, all of which pressed against the edge of his, demanding to be heard even though they didn't want to be. 

To say it was a welcome reprieve when a familiar mind entered the city was an understatement. He could feel the other's approach and when he rounded the corner, it was like night and day. 

Charles was sitting outside a cafe at a metal table and part of him enjoyed the irony. The moment the other man rounded the corner, his tongue flitted across his lips as he thumbed at the teacup in front of him. Erik's mind immediately reached for him, their minds intertwining in a way they hadn't in 30 years. For once, Erik didn't pull away and Charles couldn't focus on the rest of the city. He could only focus on the man who pulled the chair up in front of him. Erik had placed a chess set next to him on the ground. 

"How's retirement treating you?" Erik teased but his voice didn't show it.

"What are you doing here, Erik?" Of course, he could have just found what the other was doing there. Erik had given him free rein to look into his mind, he had welcomed him, invited him. But he wouldn't do that. Instead, he just let the connection simmer between them, like an extra limb, a hand that firmly clasped between the two.

"I came to see an old friend." Charles swallowed thickly at the sentiment. "Fancy a game?" The other continued, unabated.

"No, not today. Thank you." He turned away, refusing to look at those alluring grey eyes and crossing his arms, steeling himself. 

Erik leaned forward, resting his arms on the table between them. "A long time ago," He began, his voice softer than before, "You saved my life. And you offered me a home." Erik made certain Charles was looking at him. "I'd like to do the same for you."

Charles shifted, feeling the weight that he didn't know he had on his chest, lift. He didn't have to answer for the man across from him to know it was a resounding yes. He could see it; he could feel it. Erik shifted, pulling fisted hands from his pockets and offering them to Charles. He let out a breathy laugh and Erik smiled.

"Just one game. For old time's sake." Charles felt his chest tighten as Erik smiled again, looking like he was trying to withhold a laugh. He reached for one of Erik's hands and the other turned it over to reveal the white knight. "I'll go easy on you." 

Charles searched those beautiful grey eyes and felt the mischievousness practically vibrating from across the table. "No, you won't." 

This time Erik did laugh.

It was Erik who kept pulling at their connection. Years ago, they had been connected very similarly too. Charles could feel the desire radiating from Erik. Desire, lust, excitement. All that had been there all those years ago. Lust especially. But now, there was an undeniable love there. It was warm and welcoming and Charles wanted more of it. He barely noticed that they played four games, each taking turns at winning. He barely noticed when the sun set. All he could notice was the man across from him. 

Years ago, when the first met, it had been so similar. 

* * *

_Then_

_The first time they had shared a room, they slept in different beds and faced different directions. They were friendly but not close. Their first couple of adventures had been failures and after their failures, the pair found themselves downing alcohol in the newest room they shared._

_"How much experience have you had in another's head?" Erik had asked, the alcohol giving him the courage to ask._

_"I try not to invade the minds of others." Charles twirled the glass in his hand. "Most don't like it."_

_"No one's ever invited you?" Erik asked, attempting to sit up straighter in his chair. "Raven never-?"_

_"No." The response was curt. The contents of the glass were swirled more before the smaller of the two men downed it quickly. "Truth be told, I scare her."_

_"You grew up with her."_

_"That's why I scare her."_

_"You don't scare me." The comment came without Erik's bidding but the moment he spoke it he realized he meant it. He had always terrified people himself and the fear had kept people at such a distance from him. Perhaps it had isolated Charles as much as it had him._

_He watched the bob of the other's Adam's apple as he swallowed. "Perhaps when we're not drunk."_

_Erik shook his head as though he could shake off the stupor he had drunk himself into. "Of course." Silence fell between them for a moment as the sounds of the city leaked in the window to fill it. "You've been in my head." He said suddenly._

_"I have been," Charles confirmed._

_Erik thought back to the day they met when Charles dove head first into the water to save him from drowning trying to bring Schmidt's/Shaw's sub from escaping into the depths of the ocean. He had very little experience with other mutants up to that point only to find that the first one he had any meaningful contact with he felt an instant connection to._

Was that Charles' doing? _Erik worried. Charles had managed to stop him from leaving the base and the first time the other had stepped foot in Cerebro, he had felt a worry unlike anything he had felt in a long time. It was like Charles had touched a dormant part of himself and part of him wanted that connection to stay open._

_"No," Charles answered aloud. "I will not force someone to connect with me on any level." Erik opened his mouth but Charles continued. "And you're thinking loudly."_ _Charles retired not long after that, leaving Erik alone with his thoughts._

_When they readied the next morning, the offer he had given the other the night before still swirled around his mind. He realized it was another thing that he actually meant and more and more he was finding himself wanting to be closer to Charles. He was sitting on his bed when the other finally emerged from their shared bathroom after readying himself. He looked up into his friend's blue eyes and suddenly he was at a loss for words, but not for thoughts as they were suddenly swirling around his head. Most of them were about the conversation the previous night. There was no way the other man missed it as he came and sat down on the bed next to his._

_"Erik," Charles' voice was soft. "Are you sure?"_

_He thought about how unwilling he had been to have someone in his head, toying with his mind; but this was different. This was Charles and he was asking. Erik nodded and he could feel the other man studying him._

_"I need to get closer," Charles whispered before moving onto the same bed as him. Erik's eyes moved with him and he watched as the other man raised a hand to his temple, not yet touching him. Erik reached up to him and grasped his wrist. He touched the other man's fingers to temple, as he had watched Charles do when using his powers for himself. The connection was intense. Erik gasped and Charles's other hand came to his shoulder to balance. He could feel Charles' presence in his mind and it was surprisingly warm. It felt like it wrapped around him and pulled him closer. He didn't realize that he and Charles had fallen into each other, their foreheads touching and Erik had balanced himself by grasping at Charles' neck, much like how Charles had grasped at his shoulder. He could feel Charles' emotions._

Wonder, curiosity, fear. 

Don't be afraid. _Erik thought._ I trust you.

_Slowly, Charles pulled back from him but Erik didn't want him to go. He didn't know when their lips touched. It was a graze, a caress. But it made his heart thunder in his chest._

More. _His mind whispered as the hand gripping Charles' neck moved to the back, gently but questioningly pulled him forward._

_Charles' hand moved from his temple to the back of his head and suddenly Erik was pulling the other into his lap. They moved together as Charles' gripped Erik's face and he moved to grip the other's hips. He could still feel the telepath in his mind and the emotions had shifted from wonder to lust. Their bodies ground together and it was as if they couldn't get enough of one another. He pulled the telepath closer until their bodies were touching as much as they could with the barrier that was their clothes allowed. He was feeling it too; the same lust Charles was feeling. Though he couldn't tell where his stopped and the other's began. When they finally came up for air they were both breathing heavily. Charles' lips were red and swollen. His pupils were blown wide. But he didn't pull away, instead, he just sat on Erik's lap, grasping at one of many turtle necks the man owned._

_He didn't push him away either._

* * *

Now

Erik pushed Charles into the room he was staying in while he was in Paris. Charles could feel the other appraising the room, scrutinizing it thoroughly. He wrinkled his nose as he finished looking around the room. 

"Bit of a downgrade for you isn't it?" 

"I don't see how," Charles maneuvered himself through the room now that Erik let go of his wheelchair. "I have a roof over my head and I have a place to sleep."

"I suppose I can't promise much better in Genosha," Erik sighed. 

"I'm sure they will be," 

_Ever the optimist._ Erik thought at him and Charles smiled feeling it come through their shared link. The thought of Genosha had spurred a few more thoughts from Erik as suddenly images came forward of Erik adding ramps all over the island, especially to his house. 

"You didn't know what my answer would be," Charles said quietly. 

"I guess your optimism is contagious." 

"You hoped I'd say yes?" 

"I told you," Erik's grey eyes finally met his, "I want you by my side." He swallowed. "Though I suppose the reason wasn't always what I said it was." 

"And what was your reason, Erik?" 

The other man set the chess set down on the table in the room before letting out a long, steady breath. It wasn't a sigh, more like a readying breath.

"I wanted you. I want you. Charles," Erik came closer to him, "I love you. I have loved you since the day you pulled me from the water. Only I was too stubborn to admit it and I think you were too arrogant to accept it." He felt himself smiling at what the other man was saying, but he let him finish. "I'll be honest, I didn't just come here to offer you a home. My motives are a bit more selfish." Erik's hand gently caressed his face. "I don't just want to offer you a home. I want," He let out a breath, "I want to offer you a home with me." 

"Are you asking me to move in with you Erik Lehnsherr?" Charles teased. 

"Yes," The other man sounded breathless. "I'm asking you for everything. I'm asking you for the world." Erik came closer only to kneel in front of Charles. "And I'm offering it in return." 

"Erik," His tone was soft and fear flashed in the other man's grey eyes, "You are my world." 

The ferocity of the kiss took him by surprise but it really shouldn't have. It was completely projected by both mind and body before the other's lips crashed into his own and suddenly he was young and stupid again and so was Erik. They were young and stupid together and it made him feel happier than he could remember feeling in a long time.

He didn't know how they had gotten to the bed when suddenly he felt himself behind placed gently on the pillows. Erik's body ground against him and for a brief moment he wished he had more feeling only to have another feeling slam into him with force. _Guilt._

"None of that," He said aloud against Erik's lips. "I've forgiven you. I just wish I could," Charles thought about how to phrase it. "Be more active." 

That actually garnered a laugh. "Don't worry." Erik's voice was husky. "I have you."

* * *

_Then_

_There was a knock outside his door._ His door. _It was an odd thought. They had just recently been moved to the mansion that Charles had grown up in and he found himself slightly resenting the childhood of the Xavier siblings. Even if Raven and Charles weren't exactly related, they did bicker like siblings and had grown up together, they were as good as. And now he was standing in a room in their massive childhood home. Erik moved toward the door and opened it to find one of the objects of his thoughts on the other side. Charles was evaluating the door frame as though it was the most fascinating thing in the world when Erik opened the door._

_"Charles," Erik practically purred, enjoying the reaction from the smaller man. "What brings you here?"_

_"It is my house," Charles quipped, unnaturally short. Erik straightened up immediately at the reaction. "Would you like to come in?"_

_"Thank you."_

_Erik barely moved as Charles slipped past him, their bodies incredibly close to one another. Not that either of them normally minded. Until recently they had been sleeping in the same bed as each other in various hotels across the country, trying to find other mutants. Oddly enough, sleeping was all they had been doing, even though they had been flirting enough to make it seem like it was more to the outside observer. Charles observed the room as Erik shut the door. Their rooms were next to each other, so close that Erik could actually hear the water when it ran in the other man's room even without his mutation._

_"Something to drink?" Erik offered, walking toward the bottle and glasses he had on a table across from the door._

_"Please."_

_Silence fell between them as Erik poured the glasses and handed one to Charles. Their fingers brushed and he couldn't help but notice the way the other's breath hitched at the touch. Charles downed the contents quickly and placed the glass on the nearest table, turning away from Erik._

_"Charles? What is it?" Erik reached through the connection they had established so well over their search. They had practiced so much that Charles didn't need to reach for Erik anymore, he could reach instead and the link would be there. It was surface level but enough to pull them together. Charles, in turn, grasped for him and suddenly he was overcome with emotion. He gasped._

Fear. Anguish. Pain.

 _"My childhood wasn't as happy as you'd like to think, Erik. I'd like to think that if this place can do better for someone, if this place can do better for_ them _then it can get a second chance." Charles sighed. "Maybe I can get a second chance." His voice was a whisper. Charles turned toward him and the mask of arrogance he so often wore was gone. "I wish I could take your pain away. I wish I could take Raven's pain away. I wish I could take Alex's pain away. I wish I could take Hank's pain away. I wish I didn't fear for Raven all the time." He sighed. "My stepfather and stepbrother, they didn't take too kindly to Raven. I tried to deflect them often. I would make them think I was Raven so she could get away. I tried to keep her hidden so that she wouldn't incur their hatred."_

_Erik had no idea why Charles was suddenly revealing all this to him but part of him was glad he was. Charles moved and sat on Erik's bed._

_"I can't take the pain. Not from you. Not from anyone. Not even myself." Charles sighed. "I buried myself in women, men, and liquor to forget." Charles laughed. It was a dry, humorless laugh. "It didn't work." Then his vibrant blue eyes turned to Erik. "But you," Charles stood and walked to him. "You make me forget." He grasped the fabric at his hip. "Erik, I-"_

_"I love you." He didn't know what made him interrupt Charles but he did. Maybe it was the intensity of what he had just been told. Maybe it was the link that had held them together over the last few weeks. Maybe it was the alcohol. He didn't know and he didn't care. It was the truth._

_"I love you too, Erik."_

_Their lips collided and suddenly it was all lust. Whatever love the two had just felt was overshadowed in their link. Lust overwhelmed them both. Erik pushed Charles against the nearest surface which just happened to be a wall. The other groaned but kept grasping at him. Their bodies ground together and Erik found himself wrapping Charles' legs around him, pushing the other up the wall. Charles for his part was stronger than he looked, easily grasping Erik and holding onto him as he was pressed against the wall. Erik could feel his need growing for Charles and the other clearly wasn't far behind. He pushed them off the wall with the smaller clinging to him until he found his way to his bed. Charles moaned into his mouth when his back hit the bed only to squirm further up onto it. Erik followed, crawling more onto the bed. Together, they ripped and tore off clothes until they were pressed against each other. Charles took a moment to admire Erik's body and Erik was breathing heavily. He felt the other's hands travel down his chest and he shivered. When he finally caught his breath, he moved to Charles' neck, only to hear his name chanted like a prayer inside his mind. A hand kneaded in his hair and another gripped at his back. He ground his lower body down, enjoying the rather loud moan that followed. A few more movements and some spit later and he moved his hand downward only pressing forward when the other gave his consent. Erik reclaimed the other's mouth as his finger entered and a moan echoed from Charles' throat. He added another and then another before he finally let go of Charles' mouth and began moving his own downward. Teeth and tongue trailed down a pale chest and torso until they reached a hard length._

_Grey eyes met blue as Erik took Charles in his mouth, never breaking eye contact. Charles resisted the urge to arch his back. There was almost too much pleasure for him and Erik was enjoying every minute. He hit the tender bundle of nerves and he saw Charles thrash above him. His tongue trailed over the other's length before taking him in his mouth again, bobbing his head up and down again, hollowing his cheeks._

_One word came through loud and clear in his mind that made Erik slow his movement._

Close.

_"Oh no," Erik purred as he withdrew his hand and began kissing his way back up Charles' body. "We can't have that." He said between kisses._

_Finally, he recaptured the other's mouth and Charles's gripped him desperately. Charles moved to wrap his legs around Erik's body, a silent plea ushered between the two of them. Erik moved to prepare himself and Charles before pressing himself against the other man. There was another silent yes before he entered slowly. Both moaned this time and Erik couldn't hold back the shutter that passed through his body. His head dropped as he pressed himself into Charles and when his eyes came back up, the connection between the two of them was so much deeper than it had ever been. Their gazes held as Erik started moving, his hands on either side of the other's head. It was slow but so it intensified. It was a hungry and demanding movement that they both wanted. Charles dug his fingernails into Erik's bicep, both moaning but neither breaking eye contact._

_Charles lost it first, painting both their stomachs white. His body arched and he finally broke eye contact with Erik. Erik thrust for a few movements more and he soon followed, his body shuddered and he was soon collapsing and panting on top of Charles. They lied there like that for what felt like an eternity. Charles wrapped his arms around Erik and Erik gripped Charles's shoulder, his face tucked into the other man's neck._

_"I love you," Erik whispered._

_"I love you too," Charles whispered back._

_As if they were both afraid that saying it too loud would mean that someone could take it away._

* * *

Now

Erik set them both down on Genosha. The sun shone brightly over them and the flowers were in full bloom. It was beautiful. Part of Charles wondered why he hadn't come here sooner. The wheelchair followed a carefully set path in the middle of the houses until it came across an entirely metal one. He knew immediately that the house they were approaching was Erik's. Mutants had approached them here and there, curiosity at the forefront of their minds with fear close behind it. Most were easily dismissed with only some wondering why Professor X was suddenly there. But Erik waved them all off. Soon, they were inside his house and Erik closed the door on them all. 

"They know you know," Charles said, unable to help the smile in his voice. 

"I think people have always known," Erik answered, unbothered. Instead, he turned the wheelchair around, making it obvious he was attempting to distract Charles.

The distraction worked. The house was beautiful, or so Charles thought. It was rather simplistic but it was completely Erik. 

"Welcome home," Erik whispered in his ear.


End file.
